We Will Fail

I get pretty tired of the ol’ gloom and doom mentality. It seems to be everywhere. And I’m talking everywhere within the church! Ever notice how many Christians can’t speak with any real authority or confidence regarding their faith?

It’s discouraging, to say the least.

And I’m so hyper-aware of it that daily, I try and portray a pillar of strength to everyone falling apart around me…as if their very connection to Christ hangs in the balance. It’s a tough job.

Ok, it’s an impossible job.

Now, on the matter of Christ, I stand firm. He is everything. And I fully believe it’s only in planting our feet firmly on His Word and His Love that we’ll find fulfillment in this life we’d never know otherwise. I have experienced this enough to know.

But living this perfectly as seen through my own unshakable faith is another matter altogether. I often fail.

As was the case this past Friday. I had a bad day. And I’m glad I spent a portion of it with my family. They have seen, more than anyone, the days when I am far from unshakable. I was feeling so hopeless on this particular day, about a breakthrough I’ve waited years for the Lord to deliver, that I couldn’t stop crying. Literally, I couldn’t stop. It was as if I was leaking out the eyes and no amount of positive thinking could stop the flow. In a restaurant…yikes. I was embarrassed and so tired.

But when I left, I knew I was loved and supported…and understood. And my family was, once again, sweet salve to wounds that have yet to heal.

I wish I could have just maintained that feeling of love and support but I focused on and off the rest of the day on my failure. I failed at being unshakable.

I’ve failed at that a lot lately.

***

My friend, John delivered the communion meditation during our service yesterday and he made it a personal testimony.

He spoke of his own waiting. He spoke of trusting God for a breakthrough and the excruciating pain and his anger and his questioning God with all of the “whys”…and then he spoke of the day the breakthrough came.

John was so beautifully honest. He pointed out the times he poorly handled his waiting but how God delivered just the same.

Isn’t that the very picture of our Jesus?…Grace beyond what we could ever come close to deserving.

John spoke of his victory with tears in his eyes and profound praise in his heart. And he spoke of what God accomplished in him while he was doubting.

I was taken aback.

I was blessed beyond measure.

And my heart began to come alive and beat again with hope.

Friends, we have no idea what God is accomplishing in these times when it feels like He’s all but forgotten us. He hasn’t. And we can trust His heart. A breakthrough will come and when it does, we will have the blessed insight of hindsight. We will see He walked every painful step with us and His plan was always good. If, in the thick of things, we can’t see the bigger picture, all that matters is He can.

I celebrate John’s victory with him and his family and we give God all the glory. I’m reminded that the loving people around us will help us see through the woods on the days we can’t. And that, if God has all of this firmly in His control, we will experience that day when the fear of defeat will visibly crumble under the weight of our Rock…even though it’s been crumbling all along.

Our imperfect faith can’t block the blessings of a perfect God. And if our foundation is in that alone today, we are standing on blessed ground.

Thank you to my family, for loving me fiercely. Thank you to John, for life-changing honesty. Thank you to our Father, for never letting us go…

and for the many victories You’ve already established in our futures.

As for God, His way is perfect! The word of the Lord is tested and tried; He is a shield to all those who take refuge and put their trust in Him. Psalm 18:30 AMP